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by  |  03-Apr-2016 03:09

Ideally all of the direct mourners sit shiva in the house of the deceased, for it says, "Where a person lived, there does his spirit continue to dwell." Thus the presence of the person who has passed away is strongest in his own home. Particularly, a home of one of the direct mourners will be filled with the spirit of the loved one who is now gone.

Memories will come easily there, and part of the comfort of the week of shiva is sharing such memories.

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When followed carefully, these stages guide mourners through the tragic loss and pain and gradually ease them back into the world.

One mourner said her journey through the stages of mourning was like being in a cocoon.

People are confused as to how to sit shiva and how to properly pay a shiva call.

Because people do not know, and because talking about death makes people nervous and awkward, the shiva house often turns into a festive gathering filled with nervous chatter, instead of the proper house of mourning.

To be seen during the day in public would force one to put on a "public face" which is inappropriate during this time.

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